Looking In

the blank canvas gives me panic
my soul is locked behind these walls
nothing I can do to break through
tentative rants blocked by tenacious distress
numbed myself through the weeks
get lost in the ocean
drown in the clouds
forget all that equalized you
early mornings and healthy meals
groggy light with silent evenings
you were warned years ago
the promises amplified to my ears
too bad I fell for the oldest trick
empty promises painted grey
stamped through the neverend
they won’t let it go
all those times that you tried
always failing the cause
sign more proclamations
it won’t make a difference
you’re on the outside
you don’t decide anymore

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